Thursday, March 11, 2010

Be Careful What You Name Your Pet

The kitty on the milk can was named Amelia, after Amelia Earhart, because of her constant exploring. She got into EVERYTHING. Last year, just like the real Amelia, she mysteriously disappeared. Crazy, eh?

We still have her two long-haired sisters.Cats on the porch

We named the orange and white one Lucky, because, when she was little, she survived a trip down the highway under the hood of my husband’s car. It took her twice to learn there are better places to nap. We were lucky we named her Lucky.

My husband began calling the dark one Ugly from the day she was born. We tried out different names, but none of them stuck. Her fur is thick, and fine, and there’s no real pattern to her coloring.

I’m so terribly embarrassed to say, we still can’t agree on a different name, and she remains…Ugly. Long haired cat 2

Every spring, Ugly’s thick coat gets matted in spite of my best efforts to keep it combed out. And every spring, though usually later in the year than this, I sheepishly take her to a grooming place and pay them to fix it.

The nice ladies at the Barking Lot (real name) sometimes, thankfully, forget to ask for the cat’s name. They get her all combed out and Ugly' is none the worse for the wear. Usually.

This year, Ugly’s coat got beyond me much sooner than normal. Saturday, I sent my husband to drop her at the groomer’s on his way to the store.

When he got back, he yelled in from the front door, “Ah, Hun? I got your cat here. (pause) Do you want to come see her?”

Busy, I yelled from the bedroom, “Just let her go outside on the porch. I don’t need to see her.”


“Ah, Hun? Can you come here?”

I flopped the basket of clothes on the bed and went to see.

When he let her out of the carrier, my mouth hit the porch floor.

Ugly had a new doo. And I lost the power of speech. By the time I got my camera, the poor thing had hidden under the van, no doubt wishing for sudden death.

poor kitty “WHAT did they DO to her?”

“They shaved her,” he said, keeping his face blank. Obviously unsure how I’d take it.

“I can SEE that,” I said, incredulous. “But they know she’s an outside cat,” I went on, shaking my head. “She looks like a poodle. She’ll freeze! What were they THINKing??? What are we going to do with her? The poor thing.”

“They told me they had no choice. The hair didn’t even come apart when they cut it off. It was awful. They showed it to me. It came off in one great big sheet,” he explained, scrunching up his nose.

We both stood there. Looking at her. For a full minute.

Then, my husband’s mouth started to twitch and he couldn’t hold it in any more. He laughed till the tears ran down his face.

I started giggling. “I’m glad it was you that took her. How embarrassing.”

We stood there laughing till we both needed tissues.Lioness

When she pounces, she kind of looks like a lion. Don’t you think?

lioness 3

So, I guess if there is anything you can learn from our story, it’s this…

Be careful what you name your pets. If you can think of something besides Ugly, perhaps we’d better try it. For her sake. :)

For those of you who are concerned about her staying warm, she is now living (quite happily) in our garage until the weather warms up. Or she grows some hair back.

PhotoStory Friday


Mari said...

Thanks for the laugh! Poor Ugly!

Ellemes said...

Love this! How funny!

Growing up I had a cat named Ugly too, oddly enough she sorta looked like your Ugly...

It Feels Like Chaos said...

That's hilarious! And I can't imagine how I'd ever be able to take her to the vet or groomer and give the name with a straight face. For some reason it reminds me of the time my husband made our home alarm security code "elbow", so that whenever I accidentally set off the alarm they'd call and I'd have to say that word. I always felt so silly! When we moved I chose the security code and it is much less silly, but strangely I don't remember it nearly as well!

Kelli @ writing the waves said...

I was thinking she looked like a lion too. That's hilarious!

Momma@Live. Laugh. Pull your hair out said...

Bahahahahahahahaha!!! I mean...umm....poor thing......

..maybe you can buy her some cat clothes!

Lolli said...

I am dying. DYING! That is one ugly cat (said in the nicest of ways, of course!). And that poor haircut! Wowzers. :)

Bri said...

OMG!!! i am dying of laughter and my husband came and wondered why! hahahaha Great way to tell a story! Poooor UGLY!! This is just about the funniest story of a cat I've read!!

My cockapoo is names Newman ~ after Paul cuz he had blue eyes as a baby. It took a while for us to find a name that fit. When he's in trouble it's Newman (the Seinfeld character). Newman!!! I hope you have more stories of Ugly..i'm going to bookmark your site. I'm still cracking up LOL

Chris said...

Ah, that's so funny!

Thanks for the laugh!

La said...

cute ugly!

they said there's a prayer in a name. so I agree with you any way.

The Real Me! said...

Oh my friend! This was cracking me up! Have mercy. That poor cat. LOL!
Oh I"m so glad you shared this story.
Have a fabulous weekend!

Robyn said...

That was funny. She does look like a lion though.

amy said...

what a funny little "lion"

Cecily R said...

HAHAHAHAHAHA! That's like a cartoon or something! I think your post is one that I will show Isaac when he get home (a supreme compliment...he appreciates good humor). Then we will both snort. :)

Emily said...

Awe, poor Ugly! I hope it grows back fast.

kaye said...

I think it's a great name--and this was a fun story

Kaye-the road goes ever ever on

SophieMae said...

LOL! The poor humiliated thing! Maybe you could just call her UGG for short. It's a very fashionable name these days.

Have a JESUS-filled day! ^i^

Kelly said...

That is hilarious. Poor poor kitty!

Carrie and Troy Keiser said...

Oh MY Gosh!!! I seriously laughed right out loud reading and seeing this! That poor kitty! She does kinda look like some strange little lion with that do!

Jac @ Wuzzle Makes Three said...

It's funny how cats seem to live up to their names, isn't it? I literally laughed out loud while reading this!

We once had a cat named Spartacus. He really thought he was a "strong man" and knocked the TV over one day... LOL!